Saturday, October 29, 2011

Snowtober

That's the word my daughter used when she posted this photo on facebook today. It's the view from her NYC apartment window.



Those whiney slackers in Zuccotti Park will be goosepimply this Halloween and it won't be from spooks. God bless Global Un-Warming. Now maybe the OWSters will crawl back to their parents' basements and let those who work for a living get on with it.

Snowtober...another savory word for my syllable soup.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Hilarious Headline

Woman allegedly beaten with frozen armadillo.

The weapon--unfrozen


Here's some more armadillo...



Back during the Depression--desperate Texans ate armadillos, which were considered "poor man's pork" and called "Hoover's Hogs". Given the crapola economy, I might soon be serving up Obarmadillo Soup.

Selflessness

That is what one pregnant mother displayed when she gave her life for her child. When Stacy Crimm was diagnosed with a brain tumor, she refused to terminate her pregnancy and undergo chemotherapy.

I was almost confronted with that same difficult choice when I was pregnant with my son. I had suddenly lost my sense of smell and then after a couple weeks, began smelling something akin burning tires. In fact, everything I ate tasted like burnt tires.

My ob/gyn thought it could be a brain tumor and ordered an MRI. She said that if I had a malignancy, I would have to abort the child if I wanted to survive.

Fortunately, the tests came back negative, so I wasn't compelled to make that life and death decision. Three months later, my sense of smell slowly returned.

Stacy Crimm died this week after giving birth to a sweet baby girl named Dottie.



God rest Stacy's beautiful, selfless soul.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

What Percent are You?

The Occupy Wall Streeters' mantra is--WE ARE THE 99%.

Since evil greedy millionaires and billionaires comprise the 1%, I guess that technically lumps me in with the socialist hippie hordes stinking up cities around the country.

No thanks! You won't find me at poopstock.

I belong to another group--the folks who actually pay income taxes.

I AM THE 53% Join us!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Under Doggerel

President Obama says he's the underdog of 2012. I checked my thesaurus and here's what I found:
Noun 1. underdog - one at a disadvantage and expected to lose
nonstarter, unsuccessful person, loser, failure - a person with a record of failing; someone who loses consistently
He's right! He IS an underdog.

Although I would prefer the word LOSER instead of UNDERDOG. People tend to pity and support underdogs--and the only ones truly deserving of pity these days are us taxpayers.

So it is to the real underdogs that I offer this little doggerel that appeared in several US newspapers in 1859, under the name of David Barker:

UNDER DOG IN THE FIGHT

I know that the world, the great big world,
From the peasant up to the king,
Has a different tale from the tale I tell,
And a different song to sing.
But for me - and I care not a single fig
If they say I am wrong or right wrong,
I shall always go for the weaker dog,
For the under dog in the fight.
I know that the world, that the great big world,
Will never a moment stop.
To see which dog may be in the fault,
But will shout for the dog on top.
But for me I shall never pause to ask
Which dog may be in the right
For my heart will hear, while it beats at all.
For the under dog in the fight.
Perchance what I've said I had better not said,
Or 'there better I had said it incog.
But with my heart and with glass filled up to the brim
Here's health to the bottom dog.

I'll drink to that!!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Taxidermized!

I can't believe this dude lives just a few miles up the road in Santa Barbara County, home to those gun-grabbing, bible-stomping, limousine liberal neighbors of Al Gore.

This crazy Californian is a keeper. Plus, his commercial is so stupid it's practically cool.

Smug and Smugger

and Smuggest!!



Hey, President Obama, with your approval rating now at 39% how about a side of humble pie with that bowl of smug soup?


Saturday, September 17, 2011

Celebrate the Most Powerful Words in America

Happy Constitution Day!



Today, we celebrate the 224th anniversary of the signing of the United States Constitution.

In 1981, President Ronald Reagan, who revered this document, made the following statement:
"The Constitution of the United States of America has endured over two centuries. It remains the object of reverence for nearly all Americans and an object of admiration by peoples around the world. Unfortunately, the assault by 20th century liberal theorists and activist judges has seriously undermined respect for America’s core principles, denigrating some constitutional rights they disagree with and making up others. Fortunately, there has been a renewed interest in the Constitution in recent years, as Americans seek to understand the founding principles and enduring truths that form the bedrock of our chosen form of self-government. Clearly, the future of liberty depends on America reclaiming its constitutional first principles."

People often call our nation the greatest democracy on earth. They are wrong. We are not an absolute democracy; we are a constitutional republic--and that is what makes our nation truly great. We are not ruled or tyrannized by majority urban mobs. Fly-over country and small states receive fair representation.

We must respect and protect our constitution, for with it America remains the world's last best hope. At least in the Soup's humble opinion.